“not a shred of evidence exists in favor of the idea that life is serious.” –ben stein

i have decided to compile a list of things that i need to do in order to have a fun, exciting life.

1. experience the most intense rainstorm i have ever been in and try to run to class in it…or try to catch the bus in it…or do anything in it for that matter.

…check. (in case you’re wondering, had i jumped in the pool after running around in the rain, i would have been able to dry myself off. and my fake vans, which were normally a light purple color, were plum.)

2. have your mirror fall off your wall, have half of it shatter, and leave the other half sitting in the living room.

…check. (some guys were over yesterday to make us breakfast before conference. i was still in bed when they came. one of them poked his head in our room to sing me a wake up song. as soon as he did, the mirror came crashing down. not really his fault, but we still blame him.)

3. own a snuggie.

…check. (someone tried to run off with mine yesterday. his name is daniel. i call him rocky [yes, as in rocky balboa]. he’s in the army. i ran after him. i almost got him. did i mention how he’s in the army? don’t worry about it. i’m just that cool.)

4. own a sandwich box.

…check. (yeah that’s right. be jealous. i have a sandwich box. that way my sandwich won’t get smooshed in my backpack. and i don’t even have to use the fruit gushers box anymore!)

5. have the best mom in the world.

…check. (my mom made me and the asian some sweet sassy curtains for our room. and then we put up some letters and sunflowers. yeah my mom is basically the bombdotfreakingcom.)

6. lie to your ward and tell them that you and one of the missionaries from your parents’ mission is your cousin.

…check. (allan escobar and i? totally cousins. can’t you see the resemblance?)

7. hang out/be friends with said missionary (who, if you remember, at one point was your “cousin”), which would result in “everyone” thinking that you’re dating.

…check.

8. have the most amazing and fun roommates who i can count on for anything, especially one in particular who always forgives me when i say things i don’t mean and whom i love even when her hair is a dilemma.

…check. (i love you anne tallulah shirley)

9. try to focus when there’s a head hanging from some fabric tied to a hanger.

…working progress. (on the other side of my complex, someone decapitated a manikin, and the head is tied to some orange cloth which is tied to a hanger which is hanging from the railing. it keeps turning and rotating. i swear it’s looking at me. creepy.)

10. own a bird.

…working progress. (i’m sold on the idea. my friend alan dennis [not to be confused with allan escobar—the cousin that i’m apparently dating] is sold on the idea. goose is sold on the idea. now i just need to work on the parentals…)